How To Deal With Negative Thoughts

Hi friends,

One of the hardest parts of recovering from my experience at RZIM was dealing with persistent, unwanted thoughts.

I’d be sitting at my desk, trying to work, when a flashback would hit—a memory of a painful experience from RZIM. It would pull me into a funk, and I’d struggle to recover emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.

As I worked through this, I turned to Scripture and the best insights I could find from psychology to overcome these negative thoughts.

The first and most important point is to realize that God is greater than these negative thoughts.

For instance, Romans 8:35-39 says,

Who can separate us from the love of Christ? Can affliction or distress or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written:

Because of you
we are being put to death all day long;
we are counted as sheep to be slaughtered.

No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

The difficulties of life don’t defeat me.

Instead, they remind me that God’s love, shown in Jesus, defeats my challenges.

So, instead of running away from my negative thoughts, as if they were too much to handle, I could rely on God as I faced my fears.

Would these bad memories have the final word? Or did God?

I had to decide (over and over again) that God was greater, and he loved me.

But how do we face our fears?

First, I had to focus on building a healthier lifestyle.

This meant going to the gym every day, whether or not I wanted to, and exercising. I started to eat salads for lunch regularly. I went to bed at the same time most nights of the week and woke up at the same time most mornings. I took walks.

When I felt really down, sometimes I would write down a list of five good things in my life that I was thankful for.

I thought of ways to serve others, and I did some of them. I called friends, and we did fun things together. I went to church.

In 1 Corinthians 6:19-20, Paul writes,

Don’t you know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought at a price. So glorify God with your body.

Now, he’s speaking to the entire church community, not to individuals. And his primary focus in this passage is sexual holiness, not eating salads for lunch. Nevertheless, his principle applies to a broader range of concerns.

Does God want his people to neglect caring for themselves? Or does he want us to honor him by taking responsibility for our well-being and holiness?

By building a solid foundation for my life, I experienced healing and gained more and more strength to handle the negative thoughts from the trauma I’d experienced.

In doing so, I believe I was experiencing the work of the Holy Spirit and being a good steward of my life before God.

Second, it helps to write down and talk about the negative thoughts.

Sometimes, I’d talk about how I felt with my counselor, wife, and friends. Other times, I’d sit in the most comfortable chair in my house or at a local coffee shop and journal about my experience.

“I remember when so-and-so mistreated me. They said XYZ. It made me feel like this and that.”

By doing this, the negative thought goes from fuzzy to clear, from inside of my head to outside of my body (it’s on the paper or heard by a friend), and less emotionally intense.

How much did it help? Some, sometimes, a little bit. I’m not promising quick fixes!

But instead of trying to bottle it up, or ‘fight it’, or run away, I reached out for support, and I ‘got it out of my system’ by journaling about it.

Repeatedly. Over and over again. For years. But I kept going because I sensed that the frequency and intensity of these thoughts was decreasing.

Third, I learned techniques to become a stronger person who can successfully handle negative thoughts.

For instance, instead of accepting the initial feeling, “I am worthless,” I can challenge that. I can remind myself, “God says I am made in his image,” and then I can reflect on it.

Like this:

I am having the thought, ‘I am worthless.’ Interesting.

Ok, I feel it strongly. Hmmmm. Ok. That’s there, let’s take a moment.

Well, I don’t have to worry too much about that. Lots of people feel this way. Just because it seems true doesn’t mean it is true.

After all, I got a really nice compliment on my latest video. And if I asked Jesus about this, he would smile and gently remind me that he loves me.

I still don’t feel great about myself. But what I can do is read a chapter of this book, and then see how I feel. If I need to come back to this thought I can. But for now, I’d rather read this book instead.

Fourth, sometimes the problem goes beyond us

I’m not diagnosing you or anyone else. But I have seen that for some people, the only way they recovered from their depression or anxiety was with medication. This is something you have to think through and decide with a qualified medical professional.

I just wanted to note that it is amazing that we have treatment plans that can help us get better. It’s my belief that for some, seeking medical help can be part of God’s provision for their healing.

In conclusion…

Sometimes, I still have unwanted negative thoughts that disrupt my day.

I am a human being, not a beatified saint.

But I am in a better place than I was, and I’m grateful for God’s work in my heart and mind.

The hardest part is getting started, and that’s when it’s essential that we reach out for support. The second most challenging part? To keep going. :slight_smile:

The good news is that God is always there. His love is constant, gentle, strong, and enough. As we rely on him and live in the power of the Holy Spirit, I believe we can often get better.

As a final encouragement, here’s what Isaiah taught us:

Do not fear, for I am with you;
do not be afraid, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you; I will help you;
I will hold on to you with my righteous right hand (Isaiah 41:10).

Let’s discuss…
What does it mean to you that God is greater than unwanted negative thoughts?

What has helped you gain the strength and wisdom to respond to this challenge?

Any other insights?

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What does it mean to you that God is greater than unwanted negative thoughts?
It is the conviction that God has a greater and more wonderful answer to what we ask or think.
So, I think that everything we ask for, explain, and question is because of the conviction that God’s plan, answer, and path are greater and better.

What has helped you gain the strength and wisdom to respond to this challenge?
I think it is conversational prayer, or speaking in the Word, praying, or listening to similar testimonies to gain courage and faith.

Any other insights?
Listening to or singing songs and praises.

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