Hello @jenn, Welcome to the UP community! This kind of question usually doesn’t arise in a vacuum, and probably comes out of an unmet longing to experience a loving Christian community. If you’ve been hurt by hypocrisy in the Church, I know its not easy to bear that pain alone and I’m truly sorry. I pray the Lord sends loving genuine Christians your way.
Jesus too is grieved by religious hypocrisy as described in Matt 23. Apostle Paul addresses it in 2 Corinthians 10-12. Hypocrisy has always existed in the Church. But I hope we can also talk about what it is, and what it isn’t, because that distinction matters. Sometimes people confuse hypocrisy with immaturity, but the distinction is important so that we respond appropriately.
Hypocrisy is when someone knowingly pretends, appears righteous while deliberately hiding sin. An appropriate response is to expose it for what it is based on Matt 23.
Spiritual immaturity is different. It’s when someone genuinely believes in Jesus but is still growing. Their hearts may be sincere, but they’re still inconsistent and struggling to bear fruit. Perhaps they didnt have the right mentors or right teaching. An appropriate response here needs to be that of loving encouragement
Both kinds can be hurtful to others, but one is a heart issue of deception, and the other is a growth issue.
I have thought about why people may not want to discuss hypocrisy and its probably to preserve unity in the church. As believers we are all members of the same family of faith and we may want to talk about such issues with care. Many don’t always know how to go about it. Some are afraid of being considered judgmental. Others are hurting themselves and don’t feel strong enough to take a stand. Some may want to support the hurting silently in prayer. People have different ways of looking at things and that too may create barriers. Some may not feel called to step in this way. I am not excusing the silence on hypocrisy but just trying to share possible other reasons.
What does the Bible teach on how to respond to hypocrisy? My response is not a thorough reply but hopefully provides a start.
Jesus didn’t ignore hypocrisy but He exposed it (Matthew 23). About the Pharisees, He says do as they say, not as they do. He tells them what their end will be if they continue on that path. But He also laments their hypocrisy. God did not leave them without hope though. He sent them prophets too. His rebuke too was in love.
As Christians, we may not be able to call it out like Jesus, without first considering our own blind spots and we have to offer correction in gentleness (Matthew 7:5, Gal 6:1). We are also called to forgive as Christ has forgiven us. We overcome evil with good (Rom 12:21). We may not always see fruit right away even with a biblical response but things may change slowly.
If we have been hurt, its so tempting to become cynical. But then, we only prevent ourselves from being ministered by the Lord. Jesus cares about our hurt as He himself was hurt by religious hypocrisy and we can take our hurt to Him.
Finally, I would suggest, having friendship with one or two who truly love Jesus. It takes love to heal from the hurt but it may not always be easy to find a good church close by. If its any encouragement, we are all works in progress and God is not finished with any of us.
What we see in imperfect Christians is not who Christ is. May your love for Christ stay strong in the midst of sorting through all the difficult questions.
I welcome wisdom of others in the community as well on how to think about such issues.
Lookinng forward to getting to know people better here.
