Hi everyone,
In my context (the United States), there’s an association that Christian = hateful.
Depending on the situation, it might be said that Christians hate gay people, people of color, women, the poor, or certain political leaders.
To be open about it, sometimes this is more specifically a charge against white, male, evangelicals, which is a group I’m in.
Whether you are a white male evangelical or not, you might think of some other examples where Christians are considered hateful?
What do we make of this?
As I’ve reflected on this, here are a few initial thoughts:
First, sadly, it’s clear that this is true. It’s not true of every Christian at every moment, but it is true that many who bear the name of Christ have demonstrated hatred in these ways.
And to the degree that a Christian has hated their neighbor, 1 John requires us to confess our sins:
If we say, “We have no sin,” we are deceiving ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. If we say, “We have not sinned,” we make him a liar, and his word is not in us.
It’s no good being defensive. If a particular accusation is true, it’s a gift that opens us to the path of confession and repentance. I think we should work to avoid being defensive about this, especially when specific examples of Christians being hateful are provided.
Second, I think the critique of Christians is often harsh because of the pain that this hatred has caused.
Instead of retaliating with a harsh comeback, Romans 12 teaches us, “weep with those who weep.”
In reckoning with this hurt, it seems appropriate to acknowledge and grieve the pain that has been experienced.
Third, my heart is also burdened by this because of how our reputation for hating our neighbor violates the message of Jesus.
In the Sermon on the Mount, he taught us:
You have heard that it was said, Love your neighbor*and hate your enemy. But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be children of your Father in heaven. For he causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. For if you love those who love you, what reward will you have? Don’t even the tax collectors do the same? And if you greet only your brothers and sisters, what are you doing out of the ordinary? Don’t even the Gentiles do the same? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.
Fourth, if this is about a matter of how we understand sin, it gets harder. One thought is, I think we need to maintain a way of hating sin - but loving sinners. C.S. Lewis wrote about the distinction in this way:
Now that I come to think of it, I remember Christian teachers telling me long ago that I must hate a bad man’s actions, but not hate the bad man: or, as they would say, hate the sin but not the sinner.
For a long time I used to think this a silly, straw-splitting distinction: how could you hate what a man did and not hate the man?
But years later it occurred to me that there was one man to whom I had been doing this all my life—namely myself. However much I might dislike my own cowardice or conceit or greed, I went on loving myself. There had never been the slightest difficulty about it. In fact the very reason why l hated the things was that I loved the man. Just because I loved myself, I was sorry to find that I was the sort of man who did those things.
Consequently, Christianity does not want us to reduce by one atom the hatred we feel for cruelty and treachery. We ought to hate them. Not one word of what we have said about them needs to be unsaid. But it does want us to hate them in the same way in which we hate things in ourselves: being sorry that the man should have done such things, and hoping, if it is anyway possible, that somehow, sometime, somewhere he can be cured and made human again.
When we see that sin disfigures all of us, our hearts are burdened for those we know to be restored to wholeness.
Fifth, it seems to me that Christians have a responsibility to identify the good in others. We believe that every person bears God’s image. What if we start relationships by looking for something to appreciate? It seems quite elementary, but clearly, our starting point isn’t to point out someone’s sin but to enjoy a new friend.
I’m curious to hear from you: why have Christians earned this reputation?
And what would it look like for us to demonstrate a different approach?